Kirk’s Guide to the Twoshy

Written by Kirk between the events of A Misplaced Hope and A Misplaced Life. (Slight spoilers for A Misplaced Hope)

Magical Ranks

Wizard - Mage ranks are determined by your knowledge level, not your power level, but no one reaches a Wizard rank without a whole lot of power. There’s only a handful with a Wizard ranking around the world. I’ve met two. Elodie’s mentor Gediminas, and the head of the magical university, Adelina. She’s nice enough for one of the most powerful people on the continent, but Christopher and I don’t have any magic, so she doesn’t have much time for us.

Sorcerer - The highest of the mage ranks most mages can ever hope to achieve. Ranks are all about knowledge and secrets to see who can get the highest scores on their exams. Most people going for sorcerer and enchanter rank, *cough* like Allen *cough*, are really just in it for the prestige. Apprentices flock to the higher ranks, trying to scavenge any scraps of magic lore they can get.

Enchanter - See above. Score scavengers are super annoying to hang with.

Charmer - This is a pretty reputable mage rank. When you go much higher than this training can get a bit competitive, so mages who just wanna get things done will usually stop here.

Illusionist - The lowest mage rank. You usually see people go for Illusionist if they really don’t wanna do magic but their family pushed them into it.

Witch - A mage with basic but not formal accreditation. They’ve been trained by a charmer or above. The Charmer files papers, approving the Witch as properly trained and is held accountable if the witch is a basket case and kills someone or something.

Hedge Witch - A mage with no type of accreditation. Usually self taught or informally taught, and they usually specialize in some field. I knew this one dude who made killer protection charms better than most charmers.


Cooric - The patron god of dude bros and axe body spray.

Reza - God of knowledge. This is the one most of the nerds at the university pray to.

Ravid - God of travel and tricks . . . IDK what to think about him. Tristan has a few four letter words to say though.

Dima - God over healing. She’s got some pretty badass legends about helping powerful women through history kick ass and stuff.


Eres - That’s like Earth, but not Earth Earth. Twoshy Earth.

Twoshy - This is the continent we all live on on Eres. It’s fourteen nations, independent but under some heavy treaties, and collectively called the Kingdom of Sixteen. Originally there were supposed to be sixteen nations, which you know, is a magically powerful number or whatever, but two of them got wiped out when they attempted to colonize, so now it’s the Twoshy since it’s two shy of sixteen.

Tokke Mountains - These are some mountains in the south. Elodie can’t shut up about them when she talks in her sleep. The girl needs some melatonin. The mountains make up the south end of the map for the Twoshy. We know the world doesn’t stop there, but we don’t know what’s on the other side. I mean, who would bother crossing an impenetrable mountain range anyway?

Aluna - This is where Elodie’s from. The people aren’t the sharpest and their plumbing really sucks.

Pundica - The greatest nation in the Twoshy, also my birth country.

Things and sayings

Ruakh - This is magic. Basically, when someone says ruakh you can replace it with the word magic. It’s a force that exists on Eres but not in the illusion, Earth.

T-time - Twoshy time. This is a saying we started using to keep things straight when talking about things happening in the Twoshy verses in the illusion. Time moves weird between the two and it can be hard on a guy’s psyche.

Home - Home is the Twoshy. It's where we belong. Earth, the illusion, it isn’t real, and the sooner you accept this the healthier you will be. Trust me.

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